5 Books That Helped Me Become A Better Communicator
We’ve all heard the popular idiom, “mean what you say and say what you mean.” It sounds easier said than done, especially when emotions are involved. Nonetheless, being an effective communicator is essential to personal development.
I love connecting with people, learning about their lives, and sharing interests. Some conversations would flow more than others and I was determined to find out why.
At events where everyone in the room was likely there for the same reason - to network, I questioned, “What made conversations with this person exhilarating, but with this person boring?” Turns out, it was all rooted in how we communicated with each other.
Communicating goes beyond just the words we exchange with others. Listening, connecting, and understanding are just as important. Plus, communication is inevitable and we cannot gloss over poor communication skills or else it can create barriers in growing your relationships.
As I seeked to grow my communication skills I delved into books to learn from the experts. Here are the 5 books that provided me breakthroughs in the way I communicated:
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie
Pro Tip: People love to hear their name. Get rid of the excuse that you’re bad with remembering names and value when someone shares theirs with you. After they share their name, repeat it back to them in a sentence. They’ll feel special and you’ll remember their name.
Never Split The Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It by Chris Voss and Tahl Raz
Pro Tip: This book provides great insights on how to approach difficult conversations such as negotiations. Whether you’re negotiating rent with your landlord or which restaurant to go for dinner, this book can help you approach those situations and get the outcome you desire.
The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Miguel Ruiz
Pro Tip: How you communicate with yourself matters. In this book, Miguel Ruiz outlines four agreements to learn and apply as you navigate life. My favorite agreement: Be Impeccable with Your Word. Knowing the power of your words can dramatically change your reality for the better. Learn to speak goodness into things and from an optimistic perspective.
The 16 Undeniable Laws of Communication: Apply Them and Make the Most of Your Message by John C. Maxwell
Pro Tip: Know that everyone has a message to share, including you. This book outlines how to effectively tell your story whether speaking to one person or an arena filled with people. The best stories are told by the person who lived it and can relive that moment to help others feel what they felt.
The Art of Witty Banter: Be Clever, Quick and Magnetic
Pro Tip: Believe it or not but small talk is important! It’s what breaks the ice at networking events and can make that conversation with a stranger one you didn’t know you needed. Throughout life you’ll meet people who you’ll engage in small talk with. This book taught me how to keep conversations flowing no matter who the person is or the topic. Plus, you’ll leave a great impression on people making them want to know more about you.
